Somber Thoughts

I was going to share a war sonnet I wrote in High School, circa March 3, 2000 while in ceramics.  Typed the whole thing out, after searching through folders and papers to find it, only to delete what was written.  During ceramics I didn't have to work on the potters wheel, as I had cut my finger the period before while making book covers as a library aid.  It's a sonnet of a fallen soldier dying on the battlefield.  After starring at the screen, reading over the lines, it didn't seem right to share it

Memorial Day is a day to honor the brave who have fallen in war.  Veterans Day is for those who once served, but are no longer in the armed forces.  Whereas Armed Forces Day are for those still serving.

Those who cry from the dust cannot hear our thanks.  I pray they are at peace now.  We celebrate them, but do they see?  I hope so.  My belief in an afterlife is strong, but we only get glimpses on this side of the veil.  Those who pass do see and love us still.  And I'd like to think our ancestors are aware of us and cheering us on.  Loving and giving us support, even when we can't see or feel them, during moments when we get too caught up in this world.

To those who have served and passed, I don't understand everything between heaven and Earth, but in this little prayer I give thanks.  Thank you for your bravery.  Thank you for your sacrifice.  For your courage.  Thank you for answering the call and standing up for what is right.  Thank you for the freedoms I now enjoy and pray will never die.  Thank you.

We have so much to be thankful for.  We take so much for granted.  Those who have lived short lives gave us far more than we can ever comprehend.  What are we doing?  What have we learned?

Sarah

The Creator's Playbook Podcast: Episode 58, "Sexy Beard" ~ Princess

The Creator's Playbook 

Episode: Episode 58, "Sexy Beard" ~ Princess

Hosts: Steven and Sarah

"Many stories call for a character to hold a mantle they didn't ask for. Sometimes that mantle is thrust upon them, other's they are born into is without a choice of their own. These come in many different titles and rolls. Today we are going to take a look at the role of the Princess in storytelling!We chat about what the role that Royalty plays in the world today, and look at how the character of the princess has been used in the development of enchanting stories. Join hosts Steven and Sarah as we develop our very own Princess character, and tell her story."

Who doesn't like a good ol' princess story?  I mean, Disney has sure made a business out of it. :P  We've all grown up with princess stories from movies, fairy tales, fantasy, and real life princesses.  Steven and I talk about princesses in this episode, and he purposely set it up so I wouldn't go Sci-Fi!  No, seriously, after recording this episode I texted him: "Just realized... we didn't go Sci-fi."  In which Steven replied: "Oh I intended that on purpose. ;)"  So.... hmmm.

But I like what we came up with, and I'm actually wanting to play around with these ideas for a future project.  

So I hope you have time and enjoy this episode.

Have a happy memorial weekend.  

Sarah

 

P.S. I just realized Monday is Memorial Day, so starting up Classic Movie Monday on that day seems disrespectful to those who have passed serving our country, but I will post something.

 

And... I was going to write another note but just forgot.  Must not have been important.

See ya next time...

Early Morning Sunrise

It's funny how strange certain things are when you've grown up living with other things.  For instance: Sunsets over the ocean.  That's what I grew up with.  Driving along the California coast, in various locations throughout my life, to catch the sunset.

Ocean sunsets are beautiful with sprayed pinks and purples coloring ocean and sky, the sun casually dipping below the waved horizon.

For some reason it never occurred to me that those living on the East coast of the United States didn't enjoy this pleasure (well, maybe Florida?).  Why had it never occurred to me?!!  I simply never thought of it.  But last March, completely spontaneously, my Mom and I drove the 6+ hours (which Google Maps said would take 4 hrs) to Hilton Head Island, South Carolina.

We found vacancy in an upper room hotel, facing the ocean, and that next morning I awoke before 6 am to watch the sunrise.  It was fun watching people casually stroll along the shoreline, family and friends huddled together.  

The sunrise itself was quite beautiful, and different than the ocean sunsets of my youth.  Morning light vs. evening light will always be a wonder.  The ocean and beach relaxing and calm, the surf calling for quiet simplicity.

Definitely a gift and joy I'll never forget,

Sarah

The Creator's Playbook Podcast: Episode 57 "Another Man's Garbage" ~ Living Objects

The Creator's Playbook 

Episode: Episode 57, "Another Man's Garbage" ~ Living Objects

 

Hosts: Robbie and Michael

"If your car could talk, what would it say? Maybe it would ask you to take it into the shop more, take it easy at the stop signs, or stop ignoring that weird sound every time the engine starts up. Whether it's a car, your wallet, or particularly rude scale, we ascribe emotions and feelings to everyday things. In storytelling, these things can even become characters in the story. Join Robbie and Michael as they explore the process of creating an living object character."

 

Wahoo (or is it wawho??).  An episode in which living objects are discussed.  Think "Toy Story".  Think "Beauty and the Beast".   What would you do if you found yourself in a situation with a living object?  Would that be cool or simply just plain out creepy?  Michael and Robbie are here exploring the topic of Living Things, and creating cool stuff in the process.

Hope you enjoy the episode!

Sarah

P.S. I just recorded this weeks episode with Steven, and I'm so excited for it.  We had a creative, brain wheels blast.

P.P.S Classic Movie Monday is starting back up next week.

P.P.P.S In terms of that last blog post, I'm feeling a lot better.  Still ups and downs, but so much better.  

Have a great day!! :D

Dealing with Health Frustrations

(This is stuff I've been dealing with for the last year, as a heads up)

These last few days I lost track of time and didn't realize I haven't posted in a few days.  Sorry about that.

My mind has been preoccupied with healing.  Nothing life-threatening, for which I'm thankful, but a weird thing I can't figure out, no matter how many YouTube or articles I watch/read.

It started last Spring.  Woke up around 3 am with this crazy hunger pain, despite eating enough the previous day, and went down to eat.  The pain, in my upper abdomen accompanied with back pain, didn't go away, no matter how much I ate.  Later it was followed with burps and... farts.  Well this has happened off and on for the last year, mainly around 3 am, though a few times late at night, and a few times nausea with vomiting.  Usually when I have an attack another won't happen for a few weeks, sometimes there's a few months break.

I had two of these attacks on trips.  Once in St. George early in the morning.  The second was the night before flying home last March from Georgia.  Really scary when not at home in a familiar environment. 

Well, I had early morning attacks, all at that miraculous 3 am hour, on May 6th, May 8th, May 10th, and May 12th, every other day.  On that last day, which was last week, I finally asked for a priesthood healing blessing, and thankfully I haven't had an attack since.

You know what else I did four times that week?  Eat at Costa Vida.  It's so yummy!! But yes, four times.  Those last two times I had this keto friendly meal where they cut open an avocado, put meat on it, smother it in cheese, with lettuce and tomatoes on the side.  Both times it went right through me.  Now I'm simply trying to find patterns.

With all the research I've done I'm wondered if it might be excess stomach acid, which can mimic hunger.  There's this thing called Dyspepsia, which acid builds in the stomach because it's not emptying properly.  I've also wondered if it might be gallbladder or pancreas related.

There's an interesting YouTube video by Dr. Eric Berg called Most Pain is Referred Pain, where he goes into how pain in our body could be caused by other illnesses.  Apparently if you get right shoulder/neck pain it could be due to the gallbladder.  (This isn't muscle strain or overuse exercise or simply not stretching).  Now want to know what started last year?  Randomly getting left shoulder/neck strain that causes headaches.  And that could be tied to the pancreas... though I do fall asleep watching t.v. sometimes, so it could be that. 

I don't know what's going on, and it's a little scary.  Having four attacks in a week was a wake up call.  There's not a lot I know, but right now I'm focusing on the things I do know.  I have to eat a low fat diet.  I can't have less than three meals a day.  I need to stop eating sweets (such a struggle).  And I need to eat lean meats, vegetables, fruits, and complex carbs.  

Last night I looked up the side effects of Omeprazole, the PPI I'm weening off, and a rare side effect is pancreatitis.  I don't think I have it, but this is further proof of needing to stop the medication. 

One of these days this will all make sense.

But for the time being I'm not losing hope or faith, and I'm determined to believe this can all be worked out and lead to healing.  I need to take accountability and make better choices in my life.

Sarah

The Creator's Playbook Podcast: Episode 56 ~ "Enchanting Wisps" - Fairy tale

The Creator's Playbook 

Episode: Episode 56 ~ "Enchanting Wisps" - Fairy tale

 

Hosts: Steven and Sarah

"We've all grown up with fairy tales, stories of princesses and magic, lore and legend, beauty and overwhelming wealth.  Challenging stories of love such as Snow White, Cinderella, and Rapunzel.  Cautionary tales such as the Emperor's New Clothes and Hansel and Gretel.  Evil witches and step-mothers haunting our dreams.  Join Steven and Sarah as we explore fairy tales and then create a new story full of wonder and magic."

 

Goodness, creating a fairy tale was harder than I thought it would be!!  And in all honesty I don't know if Steven and I really succeeded, but we did have fun getting creative and playing around with ideas.  Fairy Tales are an interesting form of story telling.  Short stories passed from one generation to the next: Cautionary tales, morals, good and evil, magic, beauty, gold, and royalty.  Stories containing both humans, animals, or both.  There's so much.  I got the audio book for Grimm's tales, complete, first edition, (highly disturbing in many cases), and they're over 19 hours listening time, though the first hour is simply an introduction.  

So if you have some time and want to listen to something interesting, I hope you enjoy this episode of the Creator's Playbook, and you can judge if we succeeded or not. :P

Until next time,

Sarah

P.S. Check out L. Frank Baum's book, who wrote the Wizard of Oz, "American Fairy Tales".  Such a fun little read.

Shifting Time, an original poem

I try to hold Time,

but Time will not stay.

My fingers close tight, 

but not tight enough,

slipping to the ground. 

Around me lights flash,

scenes move,

voices speed,

but I stand still.

Unmovable,

as Time moves along.

Unchanging,

as everything modulates.

In this circle I stand,

watching everyone leave,

watching their growth,

their movements,

their change.

 

I try to hold Time,

but Time won't be held.

I hold it close,

yet it flits away.

I watch it fly,

wishing for flight,

yet bound I remain.

 

Time tries to bind,

but bound I won't be,

a statement of mind

and all that I see.

 

I will break free.

I will break free.

Present illusions will not entrap me.

 

I will break free.

I will break free.

Time is eternal and I'll find the key.

Sarah Stufflebeam

(Okay, this is a bit depressing, tried to leave it on an uplifting note.  I haven't written a poem in ages, but I'm trying to not be so caught up in perfection, as it paralyses me from action.  So I'm going to have fun with words, no matter if they're good or not.)

Revisiting Harry Potter 7 at Age 38, the Same Age as Lupin and Snape

For the last few years I've been trying to listen to the Harry Potter books as the same age as Lupin, Snape, and Sirius.  This started with the fourth book when they, and I, were about 35 years old, though I got off track and have crammed the last two books this last month, trying to finish them before turning 39, as Lupin and Snape were 38 when they passed.

This whole experience has been interesting.  The first books came out when I was in High School, and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, published in 2007, was released after I had finished college.  When I was younger I never quite had the right feel for their ages.  The movies cast these characters much older then their book age, though in reality Lupin, Snape, and Sirius were in their 30's.

When Lupin complained about being too old for Tonks I never quite grasped this.  When Snape died still having unrequited love for Lilly, it never made much sense.  Now that I'm 38, verging on 39, I get it.  Totally get it.  Tonks was 25 when she died, and that is a bit of an age gap.  And Snape, understanding his unrequited love was never something I wanted to relate.

What has really hit me was just how young they were.  When you're in High School to early college, 30-somethings seem so old.  But now, heh, with 40 knocking on my doorstep next year, I feel so young.  So very young.  Sure, I color my hair to hide the encroaching white, and there's some wrinkles forming around my eyes, but honestly, right down to it, I'm young.   

This has been a fun and enlightening experience.  It's been nice revisiting the books.  They really are brilliant, so well written and developed.  It's truly amazing how many people still love, and live, in this magical world.

BTW, the books I listened to were read by Jim Dale and available on Audible.  His reading is so very captivating.  Definitely worth a listen.

And now there are more books to listen to and get lost in.

Until next time,

Sarah

The Creator's Playbook Podcast: Episode 55:"TOBI Bots" ~ Robots

The Creator's Playbook 

Episode 55:"TOBI Bots" ~ Robots

 

Hosts: Michel and Steven

"To truly understand our humanity we sometimes need to take the humanity out of the character. In this episode Steven and Michael explore the different aspects of story telling through the lens of a space debris cleanup robot as he struggles between subroutines."

 

This episode is a whole lot of science-y stuff, full of speculation and whatnot's, all about robots.  It's always fun listening to Michael nerd-out, and Steven joins him on the ride.  If you love science-fiction and speculation goodness, I hope you are able to enjoy a listen to this latest Creator's Playbook episode.

Have a great weekend!!  

Sarah

Learning From Flowers

"Learn from the Flowers.  Everyday is a new opportunity to experience, to grow toward the light."

~ Unknown (from my wall calendar)

I'm in such a Spring mood!! :D

But really, this is a nice quote.  Spring always amazes me.  Maybe a part of it is living where we have four seasons.  In California we sorta get a semblance of Winter, but not like here in Utah where it snows and everything dies.  Flies and ants seem to hibernate (sigh, the ant killing season has officially begin).  Now everything is warming up.  No more bundling up and breathing like dragons in the frigid air.  (Though, granted, breathing like dragons is really cool).

Last year during all the crazy I started buying potted plants, one of which was a purple hyacinths.  It was medium height and the instructions stated to turn the pot a quarter everyday.  Well, I got the flower all situated that first night, and the next morning I woke up to see the flower completely bent over, the top of the plant stretching for the gap in the curtains.  It was dark, yet the flower remembered where to find the light.  It was desperate for the light.  I completely turned the flower 180, hoping it could pull itself up, and it tried.  The next several days the top of the hyacinths curled up, but it never recovered.

It was sad seeing the hyacinths struggle, but it was touching as well, seeing the flower crave the light, and it reminded me to look more closely to the light as well.

Yesterday I went with my family to an exhibit in Salt Lake City, which I haven't visited since 2019.  On the way home I had the window down and the light on my face and arm.  Usually I avoid the light due to sunburns, but yesterday I needed it.  I needed to feel the light.  Feel its warmth.  Amazingly I didn't burn.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend.

Sarah

Late Bloomers

Last week my Mom was mentioning how our crabapple tree never bloomed this year.  She was quite sad about it.  All the other trees have bloomed, she said.  Something must be wrong with it.  I assured her that it wasn't too late and that there was still time for it to bloom.

Sure enough, over the weekend, I looked out the window and the top of the tree was draped with vivid pink flowers.  Now the whole thing is covered, beautiful and soft.  Was the crabapple late?  Was the tree on time?  Why the need to rush a natural process?  To quickly assume that something must be wrong if we're not seeing the results we expect when we want them?

Needless to say my Mom was thrilled and relieved.  I was happy.  It's such a delightful tree in bloom.  The crabapple stuck to its own time frame.  It didn't rush.  Didn't feel bothered that its flowers didn't appear as quickly as the others.  And now, while other trees are sprouting green leaves, our crabapple is still dressed in beautiful pink.

"The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all." ~ From Mulan

(Okay, maybe not quite a fitting quote for this blogs theme, but close enough, and a nice quote all the same.)

Sarah

The Creator's Playbook Podcast: Betrayals and Role Reversals! 0_0

The Creator's Playbook 

Episode 53: "Three Weeks In" ~ Betrayal

 

Hosts: Robbie and Michael

"How do you feel when a thief steals your wallet? Now how does it feel when a friend, or a family member, or a partner, does the very same? The very word betrayal inspires drama of all shapes and sizes. Join Robbie and Michael today as they explore the workings of Betrayals in story telling."

 

And!!!...

 

Episode 54: "Clockwork" ~ Role Reversal 

 

Hosts: Steven and Robbie

 

"Some of the best stories have a twist ending. There are many kinds of plot twists out there and we will eventually talk about all of them, but today we are going to talk about the Character Role Reversal, where the "bad guy" actually turns out to be the good guy, or likewise, the seemingly good guy was bad all along.  When you cause an authentic gasp from your audience you know you've done your job well as a storyteller! So what makes a good role reversal? Where do you hide the breadcrumbs that point all the fingers at the truth but they never saw it coming? That is what we are going to discover today on Creator's Playbook!"

 

Two great episodes, and they're both a lot of fun.

 

This coming week Michael is hosting the episode with Steven, I believe.  And next week me and Steven are on the episode.  We haven't recorded yet, but it's going to be a fun topic to play around with.

 

Have a great day!!

Sarah 

 

And I just realized it's May the Force.... Oh, I should play with my remote control droid while listening to Star Wars music. :0)  Happy May the 4th ... May the Force be With You.  It's all around us!!  Can you feel it??!! ;0)  Ha, ha, ha, "You're Just as Sane as I Am."  Oops, wrong fandom. :P

 

 

Back After a 3 Week Social Media Fast...

These last few weeks have been interesting.

Usually when I do one of these social media fasts I come back feeling refreshed.  This time that didn't happen.  Maybe it was this last year, but these last few weeks ended up making me feel even more isolated, my loneliness amplified.  As an introvert I realized this blog helps me feel connected to the world.  Maybe that's a bad thing?  Just in general I ended up feeling more disconnected.

I did have some moments that were nice, spending good quality time with family.  BTW, I'm getting another niece!!

This has been a healing time for me.  Don't want to get too into it, but I've been dealing with health stuff.  All I'll say is that if you know someone on a PPI, acid reflex reducer, look into side effects and so forth.  I've been on/off various types of meds since Middle School.  Didn't take them in my 20's, but a couple or so years ago I started getting Omeprozel over the counter.  Took it way longer than advised, and I'm reaping the consequences.  There's another thing or two going on, but I've had some frightening, painful moments.  Learned the hard way you don't cold turkey it.  So I'm taking it every other day, taking collateral silver and aloe vera juice (small doses), and next month sometime I'm going to start on digestive enzymes.  A few weeks ago I was pretty sick, but I'm doing so much better. 

I'm ready to get going again with this blog.  I missed writing on here!!  

Life is crazy, but pausing now and then to heal, reflect, learn, and grow is always needed.  These last few weeks were challenging in different ways, but it was needed.  Still figuring a whole lot out, but that's really a full life process.

Sarah

P.S. Heh, I may or may not have gone onto Instagram a couple times to look up art stuff... and so forth. :\  Oops.