Wednesday, December 6, 2017

My Elf on a Shelf

Elf on a Shelf.

Whenever I think of that Elf in a red onesie I roll my eyes.

And then I'm super glad that Elf didn't exist when I was a kid, because I'm better for it.  This Elf came to the scene in 2005, so heaven help the poor little souls of the next generation who's raised with that creature.  A venomous creature with no regard for privacy.  Apparently Mr. little elf hangs out spying on kids and then reporting to Santa whether or not the kids are good, and then gets into mischief while hiding and seeking.  Who's going to report the Elf for being naughty?

At the end of the book, which I haven't read for rebellions sake and learned on wikipedia, if you touch an Elf it looses its magic and can't return to Santa.  If I was a kid I would touch that elf and hide it myself so I can maintain my independence without outside judgement.

Suddenly that line from Santa Clause is Coming to Town becomes a whole lot more creepy: "He knows when you are sleeping.  He knows when you're awake.  He knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake."

Serious Santa, what's the deal?

And I just admitted to owning a Legolas Barbie doll . . . -_-;;

Still, sexier than that little red thing.

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