Finding the Right Pace

Mosiah 4: 27 "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

This is the scripture I read over and over again when I was in college, and it's a scripture I've allowed to slip from my mind!  With all the things I'm trying to do and accomplish, my goals get jumbled up in my brain, causing me to not accomplish tasks in a proper time frame, or simply not accomplish at all. 

We all have a lot of things going on in our lives.  When there are so many things to do, it's good to list them, prioritize, and plan accordingly.  "See that ALL these things are done in wisdom and order."  We can do all things, we just need to be wise about it.

And I like the last bit about "that thereby he might win the prize."  Naturally we need to be aiming for good prizes, whatever they may be.  We can aim for prizes, goals, and dreams.

At Anthropologie yesterday I bough a Productivity Planner by Intelligent Change.  I bought it because I need to be more productive and organize my life and priorities better.

When I was in school homework, tests, and essays forced me to stay on track and disciplined toward time frames, but as an entrepreneur working on developing a family business I have to set my own time frames and goal deadlines.  Independently I'm not so talented on self motivation and staying on track.  Regardless there's something nice about weaknesses.  Weakness can become strength.  Good habits can override bad habits.  What fun would life be if everything came easy?

I'm going to organize my life and projects better, and make sure I'm doing things in their proper order, not running faster than need be.

Life's a marathon, not a sprint.  Run too fast and you faint.

How I Became Mormon; My Testimony

Nobody is born Mormon.  Even if you're born into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, you're not born Mormon.  Though, as I type out Mormon, the word Mormon feels strange under my fingers.  We are called Mormons, and though I respect Mormon as an ancient American prophet who abridged the golden plates, no small task, this is not his Church.  I am not a follower of Mormon.  Nor am I a follower of Joseph Smith.  I'm a follower of Jesus Christ.  It is Christ who is the center of everything I believe.

Regardless, Mormon is the label we, who believe and follow the Doctrines of the LDS faith, are stamped with.  It's a name I'm attached with, and though born into the Church, it's a label I choose to wear.

Still, I wasn't born believing the Church is true.  That's a knowledge I had to seek and pray for.

Looking back on my life I can't remember a time when I didn't believe in God.  There's no defining moment that led me to realize God exist.  This is something I've always believed and have never had to question.  This faith lies deep in my spirit.  But believing the LDS church is true?  I didn't even know other churches existed until I was seven years old, and I didn't grow up in Utah.

It was the beginning of the second grade, the Summer of 1989, as we had year-around-school.  The day was hot, as hot as it typically gets in Porterville California, which is an hour north of Bakersfield.  I remember standing close to the fence which overlooked a big field, which lay next to the soon to be All American City Highway, which was next to the foothill mountains, the Sierra Nevada mountains blue in the distance.  I was to the south of the slide playground having a rather heated debate over religion.

One of my classmates, her face now blurred in memory, was countering everything I said.  This somewhat out of the ordinary conversation for a couple of seven year old's started when I mentioned how excited I was to be getting baptized.  "What is baptize?" She asked me, and I explained that it involved getting submerged in water.  "Our church doesn't do that!" She proclaimed, "You're wrong."

"I'm not wrong.  You get baptized when you're eight.  And then you get the gift of the Holy Ghost."

"My church doesn't do that.  You don't go to the right church!"

And we went back and forth, na na-na na na like.  "You're wrong" this and "You're wrong" that.  The Trinity was mentioned, and I brought up the Godhead, the idea that Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost are all separate beings.  Naturally that started up a whole new debate.

When the recess bell rang I went back to the classroom somber, suddenly realizing there are other churches, and that these churches believe different things, and that they believe they're right and that they believe they attend the right church of Christ.  And then suddenly I realized, "What if my church is wrong?  What if I believe the wrong thing?" That line of thought then quickly turned into, "How can I get baptized when I could be joining the wrong Church?  And if I am being baptized into the right Church, am I ready for that commitment?" My mind spun round and round.  In my spirit I knew I could only get baptized if I was fully ready to make an Eternal commitment to Christ, and not fall back on my covenants.  At the time I didn't know "covenant" was the word that represented what I didn't want to break.  I didn't want to break my promise to God. I wanted always to follow him.

That three block walk home after school was a long one.  So distraught was my mind, full of questions and worries.  How was I going to tell my Mom that there are other churches and they feel they're right!?

When I did tell my Mom she was very patient, understanding, and bore her testimony with what she believed.  She then told me I had to seek out, ask questions, and form my own testimony, and that she would trust me no matter what I decide.  A lot of trust for a seven year old.  But baptism is no small thing.

In all those months leading up to my eighth birthday I struggled reading the Book of Mormon and the scriptures.  I was incredibly below average in my reading skills at the time, not getting up to grade level until the fourth grade.  Reading was a struggle, but I tried my best, and knew God would make up the rest.  It was around this time I stopped coloring during sacrament meeting and started listening to the talks.  If I can't fully read the scriptures I was going to listen, both in Sacrament meeting and Sunday School.  One time when we had the missionaries over for dinner they asked if anyone had any questions.  My Mom said, "Sarah has a question."

"How do I know the Church is true?"  They mentioned reading the scriptures and praying, but then they shared something that has stuck with me.  They talked about Christ time and that while he lived the church was perfect.  A mirror, fully formed, represented this.  After he died the mirror shattered into many pieces.  As time went on one truth was picked up by one group and they formed a church around that mirror piece, trying to fill in the gaps.  Another church was formed around another mirror piece or so, trying to fill in the gaps.  Another church was formed around another mirror piece, trying to fill in the gaps.  And so forth.  Each Christian church with different truths and beliefs, some the same, some different, all trying to recreate the mirror with their own pieces.  No church completely wrong, but no church completely right, because of the missing truths.

Then one day Joseph Smith asked the same question I asked.  What church is true?  They're all so different.  And the answer he received was to join none of them.  Over time Joseph Smith, through inspiration, guidance, and revelation was able to put the mirror back together with all the missing pieces: temples, prophets, ordinances, covenants, priesthood keys, gift of the Holy Ghost, modern revelation, personal revelation, as so forth.  All the mirror pieces joined together to form Christ's reflection.

I don't know at what point I realized the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is Christ's restored church on Earth, but I did realize it.  The process was slow.  Bit by bit.  And I said so many prayers.  But there came a point before I turned eight that I did know the Church was true.  I did believe Jesus Christ was my Savior and Redeemer.  I dis know Joseph Smith to be a prophet of God. And I know The Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ.

My testimony has only gotten stronger.

When I went for my interview with my Bishop to see of I was ready for baptism, I answered all his questions with confidence.  I knew.  And today I still know.

And I also knew it was never going to be easy becoming a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  That confrontation during recess my second grade year taught me that, and I knew instinctively I was agreeing to a life of persecution if I was baptized.  Porterville is a very religious community, at least when I was there, and anti-Mormons crossed my path regularly.  They tried to beat me down.  Shun me. But that only made me stronger.

I met good people, too.  One of my friends was a Methodist and I went on a trip with her church group to Magic Mountain.  They learned I was Mormon and didn't treat me bad.  You have no idea how much that meant to me.

Standing for what you believe is a lonely path, but being a follower of Christ was never meant to be easy.

My Grandpa R. gave me a set of scriptures when I was baptized, one book comprising the Old and New Testament, the second book containing The Book of Mormon, The Doctrine and Covenants, and The Pearl of Great Price.  On the inside flap he wrote: "To Sarah!  We love you!  And we present this Book of Mormon to you.  May you read it everyday.  It is the greatest book in the world!"

I treasure that inscription because of what it came to represent.  Around 2000 my Grandpa left the church.  It was a traumatic day on many fronts, especially for my Mom.

At one time, around 1990, he mailed out hundreds of Book of Mormons to those of our Scottish linage with a 4 generation genealogy chart and his testimony included.  I found one of these un-mailed Book of Mormon's in his Ventura home office when I was packing it almost two years ago.  I also found several folders containing correspondence he received from those he gave Book of Mormon's to, most of what I found was anti-Mormon literature.

In the last several years I've come to realize why he left the church.  I respect his agency.  I have to, as I'm a strong defender of agency.  Always have been, always will.

That inscription he wrote in my Book of Mormon is a reminder not to ever take my testimony for granted.  A reminder of how fragile testimonies are.

I do believe the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is Christ's restored church during these last days.  I do believe Jesus Christ is my Savior and Redeemer, the center of everything I believe, my everything.

I write these things in the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen.

The Sacredness Of This Land, And the Importance of Memorizing Scripture

 

Each week I have a goal of memorizing a scripture.  Scripture mastery hasn't been one of my strong suits, and I wish I was a better scriptorian.  I'm a woman of great faith.  I have a strong testimony.  And though I attend Sunday school, read the scriptures, and spent enough hours attending Institute of Religion classes to earn a second high achievement certificate during my 20's, I wish I knew the scriptures better.

Many years ago my Step Grandfather, before his passing and after I gave a talk when I was 19 during sacrament meeting, said with great reverence, "You have a living testimony."   He said it many times since, and I'm not quite sure what he meant by it.  What does it mean to have a living testimony?  But my testimony in Christ's gospel, and that Christ lives and is still with us, is very strong.  I live what I believe.  Though imperfect, and though I make many mistakes, I strive always to follow him.

Several years ago my YSA (Young Single Adults) stake (a stake is a group of congregations) had two stake conferences a month apart.  This is very unusual, as stake conference only happens twice a year, six months apart.  This happened because Elder Richard G. Scott, a member of the 12 apostles before he passed away last year, came to speak to us.  He chose our stake, even though there were three YSA stakes in our area.  He specifically came to speak to us.

It was extraordinary.  We were excited.  What would he talk about?

My brother and I got there really early and got close seats in the pews, a couple rows from the podium.  And by the time the meeting started and Elder Scott found his seat, he was positioned directly in front of me on the stand.  No head blocked my view.  And I watched him, overwhelmed, filled with the spirit, but also fighting depression and overwhelming feelings of self-doubt.

When he got up to speak his main area of topic was the importance of memorizing the scriptures.  To always have them within us, and the blessings this brings.

In High School I attended early morning seminary at 6:30 in the morning.  Scripture mastery is a huge part of Seminary.  Every year there were 40 scriptures to master, and every year I only memorized a couple.  It's something I've always hung onto.  A regret that I wish I had put more importance on practicing and committing these sacred texts to memory.

I know Elder Scott talked on more topics, more about the scriptures and personal counsel for us.  But it was his loving advice on the scriptures and memorizing them that stuck with me.  And I never followed through.  Always in the back of my mind I would see him, that moment, and regret that I haven't followed his counsel.  Then he passed away last year, and what he spoke came back to my memory.

And now it is Leap Day, 2016, and I am finally going to commit myself to the memorizing of scripture.  Bit by bit.  The goal is one a week, though for longer scriptures it may take longer.  But I know the sure act of it, of always having the scriptures on my mind, will be a blessing, and will enlarge my sensitivity to the spirit.  In this day and age this is a gift.

The first scripture I'm going to work on memorizing is 2 Nephi 7-8, from the Book of Mormon.

"7 Wherefore, this land is consecrated unto him whom he shall bring. And if it so be that they shall serve him according to the commandments which he hath given, it shall be a land of liberty unto them; wherefore, they shall never be brought down into captivity; if so, it shall be because of iniquity; for if iniquity shall abound cursed shall be the land for their sakes, but unto the righteous it shall be blessed forever.

"8 And behold, it is wisdom that this land should be kept as yet from the knowledge of other nations; for behold, many nations would overrun the land, that there would be no place for an inheritance."

The Book of Mormon is another testament of Jesus Christ.  Another witness that he is our savoir and redeemer.  The Book of Mormon is the Stick of Joseph spoken of in Ezekiel 37: 15-17, whereas the Stick of Judah is the Bible.  "The word of the Lord came again unto me, saying, Moreover, thou son of man, take thee one stick, and write upon it, For Judah, and for the children of Israel his companions: then take another stick, and write upon it, For Joseph, the stick of Ephraim, and for all the house of Israel his companions: And join them one to another into one stick; and they shall become one in thine hand."

But along with this, the Book of Mormon is a record of those who lived in the promise land.  This Land: The America's.  From Canada all the way down to Chili's southern tip.

This is a sacred land.  A land of promise.  Of blessings.

But this is a land of great responsibility, as well.

There's a reason the America's had remained hid for so long from the World.  And it's discovery was by no accident.  The coming forth of this land was in our Savior's hands.

The future is uncertain.  So much hangs in the balance.  But no matter what happens I put my trust in God.  No matter what happens I love America.  I love the founding principles in which this Country was formed under.  And I'm thankful for the Bill of Rights allowing for the freedom of religion and speech, which allowed the miracle of the Great Awakening, a miracle that couldn't have happened elsewhere.

We are all so blessed for this.  And I feel blessed to be apart of this legacy, for the bravery of our founding fathers, and for all my ancestors who risked their lives for this Country.  I will always be thankful.

365 Day Photo challenge: Days 4-8

 (Day 4 of the 365 day photo challenge 01-06-2012)

This photo was taken at Jordan Commons, a movie theater, and anyone who knows me knows how much I love all things Japanese, skip the sushi, especially if it's cute.  The top Japanese line reads "rirakkuma" which means "relaxing bear."  And the bit under that translates to "gently relaxing everyday."  (Steven translated; I'm still learning).       

   

It costs $2 to play, and Steven actually had a go with it, though he ultimately failed.  We spent a good few minutes debating if it was even possible to win one, which we decided it wasn't.  All the stuffed bears were squished together in just the right way to make it impossible to retrieve any, and we weren't going to spend $10 to see if one can be dislodged, only to spend another $2 to then "try" and get it.  I'm probably being too fair in assuming it would only take $12.  It's impossible to play any game of this sort and remain relaxed in the process, unless you're a ninja, which I'm not.

  (Day 5 of the 365 day photo challenge 01-07-2012)

 I was out on a morning stroll when I took this.  It had snowed the night before, and the ground was dusted in the most wonderful way.  Plus, regardless of the snow, it was warm enough that I didn't need a jacket and could get away with a hoodie.  As I came to the park the most startling, loud, musical sound greeted me.  It seemed like there were hundreds of robin birds, flying about, chattering up a storm.

     (Day 6 of the 365 day photo challenge 01-08-2012)

This is a reprint edition of the 1830's Book of Mormon.  It was sold back in 2007, and just like the first, this edition was limited to only 5000, and was printed, pressed, and bound exactly the same way.  I got this when I graduated from BYU that same year from the bookstore as a momento.  Several times I tried reading through this copy, once getting lost in Alma only to start again, and then switching to a recent edition.  Several months ago I sat down determined to read this edition cover to cover.  Last Sunday I finally finished it.

I highly recommend any Later Day Saint to read an 1830's edition, where it's read without verses and columns.  It's a wonderful experience.  On top of the book rests a small bundle of Lavender I picked at the end of Summer and hung to dry.

(Day 7 of the 365 day photo challenge 01-09-2012)

Another tree photo!  No, this wasn't intentional.  My Mom found this book all about Vinegar at Barnes and Nobles the other day, and she decided that having Apple Cider Vinegar everyday would be greatly beneficial.  So after a bought of studying with myself poring over internet health pages, we hopped in the car to go to the Health store.  But before that I noticed how absolutely exquisite the moon looked and had to capture it.   

(Day 8 of the 365 day photo challenge 01-10-2012)

 

Yes, this was taken this morning, and yes, the Christmas Tree is still up.  I think one of the hardest things about Christmas ending is taking down the tree.  The lights are soothing.  But there is a point when it gets pathetic, so today the tree finally comes down!  And in less then 11 months it goes up again, just before the schedualed end of the World, because we all believe the Mayans.  (Though I personally believe they just got tired of writing out their calender, and realized 2012 was a great place to stop.  Try writing to a trillion; you'd have to be super engaged at the task to not get bored.)

Always,

Sarah